i'm sensitive person & i don't care people think of me when i cry. even if i just sit and do nothing, when i think of something, i can cry. like today, when i was home alone. i thought that what i've planned could just happened without anything. and guess what, i'm all alone. and i'm sad. and there's no car left. BILA CAKAP DENGAN ORANG LAIN PUN SAMA JEK. TAK FAHAM. and that's why i like to keep it to myself. but until when? luckily there was dad, went home from the shop. ohh sampai satu tahap yang sedih tu boleh nangis teresak-esak lah. i couldn't utter a word. guess that tears were the only companion. i know that i could rely on dad. like he understood what i felt. and said that 'let's go and buy your laptop in the afternoon'.
that's why i love dad so much.
i just know that he understands me more that anyone else. we don't have to talk much to make him understands what i feel. just a few words & it really means a lot to me. i remembered when i failed my add maths paper for the first time with demotivated feeling. he was the first person i talked to with sobs. and just few words that i felt calm. and i managed to stand tall like everyone else today. how time flies.
i don't know if this is a part of pre-departure syndrom. i'm just hoping that i don't fall into any regret when i'm away. haish. memang emotional. kan kan.
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Allah knows how much i feel. and just now, Khawarizmi (cousin of 4y/o) came. Alhamdulillah. thank you Allah for making me feel better.
& now i can smile again.
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